बैठते थे कभी झील किनारे

बैठते थे कभी झील किनारे
तुम, मैं और ख्वाब हमारे
खो गए है जो अब सारे
न जाने कहाँ चले गए वो ख्याल प्यारे-प्यारे
बैठ कर करते थे हम बातें कितनी
शायद कभी न कर पाये उतनी
है झील भी वहां और किनारे भी वहां
हूँ मैं भी वहीँ पहले होते थे हम जहाँ
है सभी वहां पहले थे जहाँ
खो गए हो बस तुम न जाने कहाँ
खोज रहा हूँ यहाँ से वहां
इस नगर से उस नगर
इस डगर से उस डगर
शहर शहर से लेकर गाँव गाँव में
शायद बैठी मिल जाओ पीपल की छाँव में
कम से कम कोई इतना बता दे
खोजू कहाँ तुम्हे, इसका पता दे
न जाने चले गए हो तुम कहाँ छोड़ कर मुझको अकेला यहाँ
इंतजार तुम्हारा में करता हूँ
हर आहट का ध्यान रखता हूँ
गुजारिश करता हुँ मैं सबसे
खोज लाये तुमको कहीं से
खोज लाये तुमको कहीं से
तुम और मैं को हम बना दे फ़िर से
तुम और मैं को हम बना दे फ़िर से.............
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When we will grow up?

Claiming to be live in modern society but do we really?
As once again I am starting to talk about friendship where the most common problem that really hurts is that there are always some jealous people who don’t like friendships between 2 people. And the problem becomes more prominent when they are become of opposite sex. Often they don’t say anything but you can feel the same in their gesture. That is just some orthodox and narrow-minded thinking of people about whom you can say that they will never grow up when considering such matters. So even though calling themselves modern people their thinking is still age old. And its not just people from small cities acts so but sometimes we the well educated people also thinks so, as seeing a guy or a gal together we started to talk about affairs etc stuff between them. And sometimes situation become so embarrassing that either people left red faced when come to know about the actual situation, or they let go the friendship that they share together just thinking that "log kya kahenge".
In many of such scenarios, situation become much more difficult for a gal who as some boys as a friend. Some families do support this but most of others other don’t. As some people are still living in some other era where it is socially not acceptable for people to talk to opposite sex (other than close relatives), let alone befriend them.
The situation is even more worse among people/families from small towns even though they are living in metros they still don’t take such friendship as easy. As usually you see/read/hear about cases of honor killing or sometimes a family pressurizing a gal to marry or anything like that. Can’t parents trust their kids even though they turned 20-25? Usually Whenever such cases surfaces even that of friendship let alone the affair families try to suppress the cases and let girl to get married ASAP and sometimes without even considering that prospect guy is good for her or not, and sometimes even let her go with the one who doesn’t fits at all. How can parents just abandon their child in such a manner whom they loved and took care for more than 20 years? Abandon is a hard word in such context but still the way they get her married is sometimes similar to abandoning her only. And after "abandoning" they feel so much relieved as a daily wage earner feels after getting money from a day's hard work. In such cases people don’t even bother to enquire what is right or wrong they just react on whatever they had heard, not even to ask their own child as what exactly is the correct version of the story that is floating around. Just like they trust some unknown rumormongers much more than their own child.
Similar is the situation when religion comes, and a main problematic case is of friendship of people of different cult and preferably a Hindu and a Muslim. Families just don’t support them and even discourage for such friendship. When I get into hostel and then into job I remember someone asking me that which caste my roomies belong to?
I really don’t understand if I don’t have any problem then what is problem with them. Why religion is taken as so seriously?
These are the scenarios where we really need to grow up.
So, when will we grow up?

F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

A lot must have written about the series that is brilliant in itself. A really wonderful and great series that tickles u every time you watch it.
But I am not here to write anything about the series because it is just like showing a lamp to sun. But here I am writing about real life friends.
They're life. It's really nothing without friends. Even if people argue that friends are not everything to someone but they are still something that is really not less then everything. As there are times when you can rely on or talk to only your friends for those matters that you cant even talk with family.
As I still remember the day when for first time I left the home for studies I found it really difficult stepping out of home, to enter the new world alone away from the family. There I met another family known as FRIENDS to me who supported and guided me at every step most of them were also like me who just stepped into this new world coming out from a protective shield known as family. They were the one whom only I can rely upon for many things. As whenever I need anything I cannot keep on calling my family, sitting almost half a thousand kms away.
They were the one with whom I shared one of the most memorable times of my life. With the time the list got modified with some additions and subtractions in the list. Subtractions were not necessarily elimination from the list rather they were converted to acquaintances with many reasons as loss of contact, or reducing interaction bare minimum to just occasional hi, hello and nothing.
But then there are also a few people with whom even though my interaction is bare minimum but our friendship is still the same as it was. You can say this as a bonding between us as though we meet seldom due to our busy schedule or talk rarely but whenever that moment comes we share the same warmth as we did during peak days of our friendship. So in the end what matters is how well you bond with each other. As this bonding will only raise the level of friendship. Although this bonding will never arise a situation of some fight between you but if so happens then it only will help you in resolving the fights among yourselves in easiest manner. And sometimes it happens that you have had a fight and you don’t even talk for days but when you accidentally meet fight ends up without any discussion and you have just a normal talk like nothing had happened between you. This is bonding.
And that is the bonding that I always want to share with my friends and usually does so. But that is not only mine achievement, its theirs also as maintaining a friendship is both sided effort.
So THANKS all u buddies (specially the special 3 ones :)) for being there with me so far and I know that you will be there forever for me.
*********************************

hostel k woh din..........

बीता था हॉस्टल में जो कल

याद आ रहा है वो एक एक पल

फच्चा period में वोह seniors को 90 मारना

रोज़ सुबह उठ कर jogging के लिए जबरदस्ती जाना

seniors से बचने क लिए PCO पर लाइन लगाना

interaction period खत्म होने का बेसब्री से इंतजार करना

फ़िर freshers night में वो सबको मिष्ठी दही खाना-खिलाना

seniors-juniors के साथ वो water fight

it didn't matter whether it was day or night

events के लिए देर रात जग कर तय्यारी करना

अगले दिन सुबह क्लास में जाकर 1st बेंच पर सोना

events के time वो गला फाड़ कर cheering करना

फ़िर अगले event के लिए vicks और strepsils खाना

वो exams में दोस्तों से नोट्स मांगना

वो किसी topper को exam से पहले class लेने के लिए मानना

फ़िर उस class में आधे समय इधर उधर की बकर करना

exams के दिनों में वो रात को खेलने जाना

कभी volley, कभी basky तो कभी baddy खेलना

वो summers में summer job के नाम hostel में रुकना

कुछ नही करना बस prof के पास attendence लगा लौट आना

hostel में आकर फ़िर एक के बाद एक movies देखना,

RoadRash खेलना, गप्पे लड़ना और खूब सोना

वो hostel के खाने से दूर भागना

Maddu या दम आलू वाले दिन मेस में न घुसना

वो सस्सी, वो HFC, वो KL पर lunch और dinner

कुछ नही तो उपहार, मेज़बान & जायका are always there

जब मन नही हो रहा हो इंडियन खाने का,

pizzatime का 1+1 Free पिज्जा ऑफर लेने का,

then chinese was also an option available at chanakya

sizzlers, momos, choupsey और न जाने क्या क्या

वही चाणक्या में रात को movies देखना,

25 Rs की टिकट लेकर सीट के लिए दौड़ना,

अगले दिन फ़िर वही बोरिंग क्लास और वही labs में टाइमपास

लेकिन इस रूटीन से होता नही था मन कभी उदास

भुलाये नही भूलती वो पुणे, गोवा वाली industrial trip

then Goa Express वाली वो यादगार journey,

जब अचानक आ गई थी छक्को की कंपनी

10 min के लिए create हो गया था जो scene

i am sure भूले नही होंगे लोग वो दिन

फ़िर trip के वो दस दिन जिसमे थी visits केवल तीन,

लोगो का महाबलेश्वर, लोनावाला और मुंबई जाना,

लेकिन गोवा जाने से पहले वापस लौट आना

then गोवा में बिताये 3 दिन, जो निकले visits के बिन

restlessly bikes पर घूमना और beaches पर नहाना

आखरी दिन train में बैठते ही फ़िर सबका सो जाना

देखते ही देखते निकल गए साढ़े तीन साल

और शुरू हो गए कैम्पस में कंपनियों की चाल

job treat पर लोगो का पीना और नाचना

और फ़िर अचानक ये सब ख़तम हो जाना

पता न चला कैसे चला गया लास्ट मेजर

और आ गया हमारा hostel में वोह आखरी दिन

एक एक करके वोह दोस्तों का घर जाना

और माहौल वो थोड़ा सा heavy होना

याद अभी भी है hostel का वो एक एक पल

बीता था यारो के साथ जो कल

Run Away….

Sometimes I think just to run away,
run away from the world, from the friends,
from the family and from all loved ones to such a secluded place where no one can reach me, even not the closest pals know where I am, to the place where no one knows me, no one cares whether I exist or not.

For some time I just want to live in some peace, live without any hassles, live without worrying about anything, without worrying about anyone, a place where no one fights, no one talk about others, no one is selfish rather everyone is helpful, no politics, no special tactics.

• The place where money is not everything,
• the place where there are no expectations,
  
• the place where no one knows each other yet they are very much together,
  
• the place where no one forces anyone to do any thing,
  
• the place where people do things only which they are interested in,
• the place where no one interferes in others matters,
  
• the place where no one cries foul about anything,
  
• the place where no one even thinks to cheat,
  
• the place where life is a rhythmic beat,
  
• the place where silence is music,
  
• the place where everything is calm and serene,
• And the place where someone feel himself much more than others............
  

I saw a tear in her eyes....

This poem is dedicated to two of my best friends, one who recently got a new name as CHAMPAKALI given by some DIBIYA and other one LI. One is friend since last 7 years & other is since last 5 years. I intend to write more but Words merely can’t describe our friendship.

So here it goes...

I saw a tear in her eyes
when she came to bid me good bye
who was going it didn't matter
it was just the pain of departure
I wanted to utter some word
but my throat was behaving wayward
not allowing to bring out anything
rather just made me keep staring
when we crossed our eyes
time froze just like ice
don’t know where I was lost
if I am not wrong she too entered into the past
sweet memories started passing in flashes
which also included some of our clashes
the time which we passed together
whether it was alone or in a gather
all those of our endless talking and strolling
which always left people wondering
as people often say that i am not that verbal
but with her they always found me vocal
then there came a sudden disturbtion
which divided our attention
it was some outer interruption
that brought us out from illumination
she quickly analyzed the situation
and left the room with some caution
I saw her wiping her tears when she left
And then I realized my eyes were also wet...

Who could be the best friend a Man or a Woman??

What a silly question?
Yes the same was my first thought after seeing the question for the first time. For answer instantaneously my best friends come up in my mind with the obvious answer. And I know most of the people come up with the answer similar to mine as same gender person, be it male or female.
But after a while I realize that the question is not that simple as there can't be any generalized answer as a Male or Female or same sex person.
As in thinking about past few years I realized that with the time my best friends changed, most of the time they were guys but then there was a gal too. And for being a best friend in some of the situations she was much more better than guys. And its not me alone there are some other persons also whom I know having best friends of opposite sex. So its does not really matter whether its HIM or HER but what matters the most is he or she is your friend, BEST FRIEND.
The definition of best friend varies for each one but for me a best friend is

• Someone with whom you share almost each and everything even it is embarrassing,
  
• Someone with whom you can confide with deepest of your secrets which even your family don't know,
  
• Someone who will be there forever specially when you need them most,
  
• Someone with whom you can comfortably talk anything and everything,
  
• Someone with distances never matter,
• Someone with whom even if you talk after long time you feel the same warmth as you felt in earlier days,
  
• Someone who are friend for life time, not just for few months or years,
  
• and last but not least someone whom you can trust with your life.

I do have a few of them back from my school time to till now.
Do you have any?

Don't know why?

Don't know why I punish/torture myself when something is done by someone else. Like a few days ago I have had a fight with one of my friend, and until the fight was resolved I was very much disturbed. Due to such kinda stuff I skip the food, or do something which is not to be done........... The major problem is that everything usually is hidden deep inside, not reveled to outer world which sometimes hurts even much more.

Sometimes over any minor issue like something said by someone, or seeing something or even some thought(present/past) I suddenly found my mood crashed. It has became so fragile that sometimes even a small ignorable issue cause it to shatter badly. It has become like a bubble which flies happily and unbounded but just a small touch and whooooosh its gone. And when my mood got rejuvenate I realize that how stupid I am to get this done. How can i do such things again and again? Am I loosing self-control ???

Some of my friends often knows about everything about what had happen but they are sitting so far that they cant do anything for it, even they try their best but sometimes its not enough, sometimes distances does matter....

Finally by the time I come out with some solutions, which often works for me. Its just to talk to some loved one it may be your friend or family. Talking about this issue or not, just talk, talk anything or everything, more you talk more you feel good. Talking relaxes your mind and distracted other thoughts. But again there is a drawback here too. Like if sometimes you call someone, and if (s)he is busy or don't pick the call. Then I have just three words for such situation. "GET WELL SOON"
Another is to pen it down, just write it down somewhere someplace like your diary and you really feel well. And in future whenever you read it, it will really bring a big grin on your face saying yourself a stupid for such stuff...

Things beyond understanding....

There are always some things that are beyond my understanding.

Among those things there is one thing that i haven't understand yet is why people run behind the money? Why they just want to earn more and more and more. But the normal trend is to earn but not to spend, sometimes even for basic needs, let alone for helping others. Why is this so? If someone can live comfortably in whatever (s)he is earning even though (s)he remains unsatisfied in monetary terms, always hungry for more. Everyone is eager to earn more and more, not thinking about what is actual purpose for earning. When you ask someone why they are earning, the most common response that you will get is something like...

• Earning to provide easy and comfortable life for family.

But while doing this people don't think that doing this makes them too much busy that they even don't have time for their family.Wants to have comfortable life, but they don't realize that in process of earning a comfortable life they are making it much more uncomfortable. There is a very true saying, "People loose their health in earning the money, and later loose the money to earn the lost health." And in this process the life passed on.People earn for their family, but due to this they have got their life so busy that won’t able to take out sufficient time for their own family which creates distances within family. Like there is a very common forward message which is touchy also, in which a child asks his father how much he earn per hour and then somehow arrange money and give it to his father asking for one hour just for himself.

In the process most of us lost our social life, if you ask someone who is working since last few years that how many friends (s)he have out of work and club(if (s)he has joined any). In most of the cases (s)he will take quite some time to think about it and then realizes that there isn't any one who can be termed as a friend. Those who really were friends are now lost somewhere in this race of survival known as life, leaving behind only those whom (s)he regularly meet mostly at work places or clubs. When people knows that there wasn't anything they brought in the world, and they wont take anything then they go, so why take too much pain in earning so much moolah and making it a big issue. Why dont they just make a line of a famous song as mantra of life "Khali haath aaye the hum khali haath jaayenge, bas pyaar k do mithe bol gungunayenge"

In saying all this i am not saying that just earn and spend, rather earn and spend to meet your needs, its not desirable to live life king size. But its not like that also that live like a poor when you can live and provide comfortable life for your loved ones without extending yourself beyond certain limits.

Life after IIT...

Whenever there is a separation its always painful. And it become even more painful when you separate from some one so close that you can consider him as a part of your soul. Same painful was the feeling during our last days in hostel. Each passing moment becoming heavier and heavier. Somehow the moment of separation passed and we all were out there in the sea known as corporate world. People use to say that this sea is a place where each big fish is trying to swallow smaller ones and grow, where each and every one is like crocodile trying to beat others and gain a lead, where there is no friendship just business relationship, where there isn't anyone to care just a lot of selfish persons who just want there work to be done and nothing else.
But after entering in this sea I found out that world is not like this. Some people are ofcourse crazy about the work but they wont pressurize someone that he buckles up, rather they put on pressure so softly that one even not realize, and found that the job is done and well on time. The biggest thing that I miss even after passing quite sufficient time here in job are those close friends. Although I found some good friends here with whom I share a lot of things but there are always some things that you can't share with everyone and for that you need these intimate friends, friends who are like part of your soul.

But anyways life has to go on and it does With or without your willingness, and everyone has to face it. Even through busyness somehow we manage to have a small get together with close friends within every 5-6 months. Although it lasts only for few days but those few days make you cheer for long time. The biggest positive thing of living in NCR is that its home of one of those friends and its stoppage for another whenever he goes to home.

The time passed with these people was always cheerful whether its our stay in hostel, or our department GOA trip in chilling winters, or its Manali trip around Holi or its trip to Vaishno Devi in summers, or its trip to Dehradun in monsoon. Now upcoming is another trip which we are looking forward enthusiastically, and will be updated here soon.

The unforgettable years...

It was July 21st of 2002 when through out the day I was too much enthusiastic about going to a dream place for mathematics students the IIT(s). Yes I got admission in IIT Delhi packed up and all set to leave in night for Delhi. It’s for the first time I was stepping out of home, entering to a new completely different world, where there won’t be mummy or papa or bhai or sister, but only strangers. When it was time to leave home come I found each step leading outside gets heavier and difficult. That time I felt why I cleared JEE, I don’t want others feel sad as I was leaving them. Although I know they want me to go for my better future only. The next day, my first day in the institute which was dream for many but a reality for me and some others. The place was very much welcoming new students, there was a cheerful atmosphere in hostels as of new students like me and many others. The seniors were too much enthusiastic specially the then II yearites, as of arrival of new fuchhas and they became senior. The first year thus started, with so called interaction with seniors, then a lot of hostel activities under various clubs and a lot of stuff. It was the time when studies took back seat. There were some who manage to keep up with studies but I was not among those people. The majors of first sem were worth remembering when I had to struggle very hard to clear a course, the night before its paper was unforgettable one. Although nothing much prepared I slept at around 12 with "jo hoga dekha jaayega attitude" Others were with score better than mine were fully awake and were amazed. Somehow I cleared that exams and found that my grades suffered too much, I got 5 pointer. This shock was enough for me to be careful in terms of studies for the coming semesters. And thus my CG keeps on improving. The time was passing at its own pace with some rememberable trips, occasions and moments. While entering I never thought that this would be the place where I will find the friends of life time. The friends with whom I shared some of the best moments of my life. Whether its playing volleyball or basketball or badminton specially during exam time at night or going for movies and coming late night walking straight from hall covering about 3-4 kms or trip to manali in last sem or even our after dinner walks, each and everything is very much rememberable. Somehow the time has passed and we come to final semester. The placement season has started, people were getting job where as there were some who failed everytime in interviews even after clearing all the rounds. But there was a hope which helps everyone to get the job sooner or later. Similar was the case with me as I was among the last 20% of the students who got placed on campus. Then there come the last day 16th May 2006, a day which no one of us had thought of till a few days ago. People were packing their stuff and moving ahead in life leaving behind the past, but it was ofcourse a difficult time for everyone as almost all of us had found some friends here in last 4 years. And atleast for me it was difficult to leave the friends and move ahead, but time can’t stop so we have to move on. The feeling and situation was again the same as it was 4 years ago when stepping out of home for the first time, just the place and people were changed. This time there wasn't any family member but there was another much larger family a family of friends between whom I had passed more then 75-80% of my life in those 4 years. It had become hard to step out of hostel leaving behind your friends but in my case it was somewhat easier as I was among last to leave the hostel, with the promise to the close friends to meet after one month and go for a trip with them to Vaishno Devi temple. Now even after almost 2 years, I still miss that part of life. Even though being in contact with friends I still miss them as being face 2 face has much more value than talking them on mails or chats or even phones.
I AM MISSING YOU ALL DOSTO.....